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Some times the beautiful game is, well, quite ugly



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Footballers have it all – fame, fortune and the chance to play the game that they, and we, love. Many prospective talents never make the grade, and the chosen few who play in the Premier League must be regarded as some of the luckiest people on the planet.

However, some things can’t be changed; we all have to live with what God has given us, and in that respect these ten past-and-present Premier League footballers are not so blessed.

Dirk Kuyt

A lookalike of Chunk from The Goonies, Dirk Kuyt has delighted Liverpool fans and disgusted the rest of us since joining the Anfield club from Feyenoord back in 2003.

Carlos Tevez

The temperamental Argentina forward may well be one of the world’s most prolific strikers, but a scar on his neck and some misshapen teeth make him sore on the eye.

Luke Chadwick

A face that only a mother could love, Luke Chadwick was the subject of abuse up and down the land during his time at Manchester United. The unsightly winger has played for MK Dons since 2009.

Jonjo Shelvey

Former Charlton youth product Jonjo Shelvey is 19, looks 40, and although he has an impressive passing range, is not going to win any beauty pageants.

Bacary Sagna

Arsenal right back Bacary Sagna has changed the braids and other accessories in his hair on numerous occasions; hasn’t helped. At all.

Steve Morison

Strong, powerful, good in the air, a handful for defences, can play at the back or up front, no Brad Pitt, yep, it’s Steve Morison.

David Hopkin

The token red head in our list, David Hopkin’s toothless scowl and scrunched up Scottish face instilled fear into onlookers during his time with Chelsea, Leeds and Crystal Palace.

Martin Keown

An accomplished defender, Keown played a key role in Arsenal’s famous back four alongside Winterburn, Adams and Dixon; he is the worst of a very ugly bunch.

Wayne Rooney

Mercurial forward, Manchester United legend in the making and England’s only hope – Wayne Rooney is one of the world’s best. However, even new hair won’t save his modelling career.

Joleon Lescott

Part of the Manchester City revolution, Lescott has ironed down a starting berth in Roberto Mancini’s side, but would look equally as comfortable in an episode of Star Trek.