Movie star footballers

A life of a footballers is not much inferior than that of a rockstar. From awfully huge wages to their sexual activities getting closer to hypersexuality (a.k.a. nymphomania). And just like rockstars, footballers too have shown the desire to become movie stars. But unfortunately, rockstars usually don’t have problem with fluent speech unless they have had one sniff too many.

The greats of football like Pele, Eric Cantona and Zinedine Zidane have all had their share of on-screen time even if their roles were better to be not remembered. Celebrating the “Man Month” in honor of the 2010 FIFA World Cup (I know!), they did a feature on Footballers on Film.

The above mentioned legends did Escape to Victory (1981), Looking for Eric (2009) and Zidane: A 21st Century Portrait respectively of course.

Vinnie Jones is a Welsh midfielder who played for English clubs like Leeds United, Chelsea and Queens Park Rangers in his career. Still can’t remember him? Well, how about ‘Big Chris’ from the 1998 movie Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels and ‘Bullet Tooth Tony’ from the 2000 movie Snatch? Yes, that is him. I’ll be honest… when I saw both the movies, I didn’t know he was a footballer.

Looking at today’s superstars… Who do you think can land a role in a movie? Most likely, Cristiano Ronaldo but please God not him!

Here’s what I think:

• Steven Gerrard

  If you have a doubt about his acting skills wait till the next season starts and watch him when somebody tries to tackle him.

  The Liverpool man has a thug-ish appearance and we all know what happened in Southport. Role of a flimsy mafia big-shot will suit him. He will do great when he gets shot in the movie.

• Fernando Torres

  No, I’m not going to suggest him playing a sexy female!

  But if there’s ever a vampire or a werewolf who is blonde with sharp facial features and quick, light feet… He can readily do a role in one of the Twilight Saga sequels. Or maybe a role like Mel Gibson’s in What Women Want.

• Franck Ribery/Carlos Tevez

  Now… there are two roles that suit them: the unfaithful husbands and a heartless serial killer.

  The unfaithful husbands because one shagged a minor and the other reportedly cheated on his wife thrice. A heartless serial killer because of the scars they carry.

  Ribery’s family was involved in an accident with a truck when he was two and Tevez has a third degree burn mark from his left ear down to his chest.

This is our selection of possible Footballers of Film and what roles they fit.

Let us know with your movie star footballers and their roles below.