10 Things I Hate About the World Cup

10. Poor football from rubbish teams. Put in another qualification round and leave 16 teams in the end, please.

9. Poor decision-making from inexperienced rubbish referees.

8. Droning commentators (Why is it that Octagon buys the same commentary feed as the Carling Cup? Maybe because the quality of football is on the same level).

7. “Dunya Goal Hai” on ESPN India (Those two cunts are the biggest argument in favour of capital punishment after El Hadji Diouf).

6. The hype surrounding England and their percentage-man coach.

5. Olympic-level diving performances from twats like Sorin (Gold: Argentina, Silver: Paraguay, Bronze: South Korea).

4. How people who know next to nothing about the sport, and never really watch it, are all of a sudden football experts. This breed of bottom-feeders shows up in public viewing areas every two years at the Euro and World Cups. Stay in your holes, please. You’re not fooling anyone but your own kind.

3. The E.T. lookalike on SuperSport mentioning “The Magic of African Football” every 27 seconds after a rubbish performance from one of their teams. The only thing magical about that is how they made it to the World Cup in the first place.

2. Did I mention the Suddenly Susan football ‘fans’?

1. Gloryhunting Chelsea ‘fans’ saying “Yaar, we should buy him” at every player that seems to do something right with the ball.

Editor’s Note: What do you hate about the World Cup? Let us know by leaving a comment below.

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