Cristiano Ronaldo is due to make his Manchester United comeback against Villarreal in the Champions League tonight. Sir Alex Ferguson is convinced the Portuguese winger will be well-received by the Old Trafford faithful, despite his protracted summer transfer saga. Fergie thinks Manchester United fans will forgive Ronaldo, so here is some pointers of things he should probably avoid
1. Real Madrid shirt
Taking to the field for the pre-match warm-up in a Real Madrid shirt would probably be just about the worst idea for C-Ron’s comeback. And if he insisted on wearing it for the match that would be worse.
It goes without saying that he should probably ditch his fashion accessory crutches before kick-off. Unless he wants to prove that he can still out-sprint Darren Fletcher even when he is on crutches, in which case that might be quite entertaining.
3. Dimitar Berbatov impersonation
Hopefully he has not yet had enough time to learn all the best tricks of engineering your move to your dream club from United’s new signing. If he insists on wandering around with his arms outstretched in disbelief at his inferior teammates with a miserable look on his face, it will not go down too well. Then again, he spent a considerable amount of time doing that last season and still didn’t do too badly.
4. Arab headscarf
Real Madrid might seem like the perfect home for United’s former golden boy if he starts expressing an interest in extracting some lucre from Manchester City’s newly-found deep pockets, so playing the match in an Arab headscarf would possibly be a talking point. It would be the most controversial transfer of all time, although some City fans have said they would only want him to play for the reserves!
5. Pre-game lie detector test
The Guardian suggested this one, but even in Manchester – home of The Jeremy Kyle Show – the results of a pre-match lie detector test to see whether Ronaldo has been faithful to United are unlikely to be well-received. Nemanja Vidic would make an excellent generic angry relative wading in to headbutt him if the results were not favourable.